Dear Applicant - i want 2 c ur grammar

The following is a fictional letter, but one that Recruiters really would like to send back to applicants if they could afford to give actual, honest feedback.

Dear Hopeful Applicant,

Thank you very much for applying for the open role!  I mean that as I’m always interested in new applicants and I would like for as many candidates as possible to get to a job here.

But in looking at your application – in your cover email you wrote “here is my cv 4 the associate marketing coordinator job.  i know i would be a good fit 4 this role.  thanks!  hopeful applicant”

I get that you’re busy and you likely thumbed this note when sending in this application from your smartphone.  I realize that most of the daily writing that you do is text messages or quick posts to FB or other social media.  I’m guessing you expected autocorrect to fix this or maybe you just don’t "do" capital letters.  I mean heck the President of the United States just blasts off his tweets – right?  (covfefe anyone?)

Here’s the thing – that President guy already has a job (government job even!) and when that gig ends he also has a backup plan (family fortune + global corporation held “in trust”).  I’m willing to bet that is not the position you are in now.  So for you this grammar stuff counts.  I don’t know if you really know how to communicate more professionally.  I can’t tell if you are really up to the task of interacting with our customers or vendors or senior management.  The little I’ve seen from you the answer is no.  So I have to pass.  I don’t even open up your résumé.

So help me out a little.  At least give me enough so that I check your résumé or LinkedIn profile.  It doesn’t have to be a formal cover letter like in the days of old.  I just need to see proper capitalization, punctuation, spelling of the actual word, and the like.  I need to know that you know how to do this.  

I do want to give you a chance.  I really do!  Better luck next time and I hope to see another application from you soon.

Sincerely,

Helpful Recruiter

p.s.  I almost forgot!  No emojis either.  Thanks.